Big Touble in Little China: the best worst movie ever

If there was ever a movie that really was so bad that it was good, then it would be Big Trouble in Little China. The special effects, dialogue, directing, plot, and acting (0r lack of acting, I should say) are so absurd that one can't help but wonder why this movie was even made. And yet this madhouse of a film never gets old and never loses its cheesy charm.

The film starts with an old man named Egg Shen trying to hire a lawyer because of something that has to do with "half a city block exploding in a ball of green flames".Egg Shen insists that the lawyer must beleive in magic, then proves that magic in real by creating a bolt of electricity appear between his hands. This short introduction has NOTHING to do with the rest of the film, save for Egg Shen, who is later a character.

Now we are introduced to Jack Burton (played by Kurt Russel), a truck driver whose friend Wang Chi is about to be married to the green eyed Miao Yin. Miao Yin is kidnapped as soon as she arrives at the Los Angeles airport (she has jsut come from China), so Jack and Wang follow her abducters into Chinatown.

From here, things just keep getting stranger. It turns out a 2,000 year old being known as David Lo Pan has a curse upon him, making it so that he has no flesh, and can only temporarily reside in an ancient, crippled body before turning back into a spirit.The only way to return to his true form is to marry a girl with green eyes, then sacrifice her to a god. He wants to marry Miao Yin, but does not want her to be sacrificed, so he is wating until he finds two green-eyed girls; one to love, on eto sacfifice.

Jack and Wang, as well as the mysterious Egg Shen who drives a tour bus yet is adapt at magic, a lawyer named Gracey Law (played by Kim Catrall) who also happens to have to green eyes, and a hilarious collection of supporting characters are now entangled in this absurd legend, and the fun never stops.

Perhaps the best part of the movie are the Three Storms, a trio of sorcerers/martial artists who serve Lo Pan. They are Thunder, Rain, and Lightining. Rain (my favorite character from the movie) provides the funniest moment in the enitre movie, which has to be seen to be believed, so I won't go into details.

MonkeyFarm Judgement:
5 out of 5. (Not really. More like negative 7)